Gotta Tell It

After so many years, events, issues, pain, disappointment, frustration, anxiety, growth, ups, downs, blindness and seeing I am at a place where it is good. I can see God at work so clearly. But to get here I had to experience all of the above at the direction of God in my life, those around me and just life experiences. Along the way I had so many doubts, joys, highs and lows, so much anger and loneliness. But it was necessary and it was life. Before I share what is going on right now, I believe it is important that I have a little history telling. As most of you know I journal. And it is in my journal that I express much of my heart and mind. That is where I need to go in order to bring you up to date and explain how I got to where I am today.

So, I'm going to include the most pertinent parts of my journal here that will lead you through the labyrinths and complexities to where I am and then I'll tell you about today. Each chapter will have a date in which I wrote the journal entry and somewhat of a topic that pertains to that journal entry. Of course you can just wait and skip to today if you want, but it won't be nearly as much fun. "Fun," that is an odd word to use, unless of course you are a sadist. And there is a little of that in all of us.

The next entry will be the first chapter and the the beginning of my story in this telling. Much happened prior to this first chapter, bringing me to where I was at that time, and it was very significant. But I had to pick somewhere to start and it seemed to me that Friday, May 2, 2008 was a good time. It was a time I had gone off by myself to Cumberland Falls and stayed in a cabin alone for a long weekend. It was a time, probably at one of my lowest points in my life, when nothing seemed to be happening good. My wife and I were so emotionally and spiritually separated, it was scary. There was intense fear and anger in both of our lives. So I spent a long weekend alone in the woods where I just read, talked to God was completely alone and wrote. The next chapter in the Blog is where I begin telling the story.